The terms of your divorce will influence the rest of your life. If you have minor children, their lives will also be forever altered. It is imperative that you obtain the best divorce advice possible.
I’ve been advising men like you through the divorce process since 2005. Often people turn to their attorneys for divorce advice. While attorneys are knowledgeable, they don’t often share that knowledge with their clients. Contrary to popular belief, an attorney is actually one of the worst places to turn for divorce advice.
When getting married, people have two paths: An expensive, elaborate wedding requiring months of planning or a quick, inexpensive wedding by the justice of the peace. Both paths lead to the same result; a valid marriage license. Many people don’t realize that the same is also true for divorce. You can get divorced the easy way or the hard way. Either way, your divorce process will end with a divorce decree. You can get your divorce decree the hard expensive way by hiring a lawyer and going to court or you can get your divorce decree the easy way by settling out of court in just weeks or even days in some cases. Even if you hire an attorney, you should still do everything possible to avoid court.
At this point, many people think that because their spouse is confrontational and stubborn, an out of court settlement is impossible. This attitude is the wrong approach. Think about it; if your spouse is confrontational and unreasonable, court is the last place you want to end up because your spouse will dig in and drag your case out for many months. The court system is designed to help them do this. Don’t expect the judge to beat your spouse into submission. If your spouse is confrontational, than you especially want to avoid court.
When you hire a lawyer and let the court dictate the terms of your divorce decree, you give up control. When you hire an attorney and go to court, you put all your faith into the bureaucratic system and agree to let them dictate the terms of your divorce. Does that really sound like a good idea? When you negotiate the terms of your divorce decree out of court, you maintain control throughout the entire process. An unfair deal is never imposed on you unless you agree to it.
I always advise my clients to avoid court and if possible, avoid lawyers. Unfortunately, most people don’t know how to take control of their divorce. They feel that they have no choice other than to hire an attorney and let their attorney set the agenda. This is why so many divorces that should cost $500 and take two weeks end up costing thousands and drag on for months. I’ve seen too many people hire an attorney, pay tens of thousands in legal fees, make multiple court appearances, only end up with a terrible result in the end. Hiring an attorney doesn’t guarantee a successful outcome. In fact, hiring an attorney often makes matters worse.
So how do you take control of your divorce? How do settle your divorce in weeks for only a few hundred dollars? The answer is to educate yourself. Take just a few hours to understand how the system really works. It’ll pay huge dividends in the end.
If your car didn’t start one morning, you’d probably know to check the battery first. If a mechanic tried to talk you into a new $3,000 transmission when all you really needed was a jump start, you’d probably question it. You may not be an auto mechanic, but just knowing some basics will help you to get a fair deal and not get taken advantage of. Your divorce is no different, there’s just a lot more money at stake. Too many people hand over $5,000 to their attorney and never question it because they don’t even know the basics of the divorce process. Never have I seen so many people spend so much money on something so important, with absolutely idea what they’re doing.
If you’re going through a divorce, you need to educate yourself with great divorce advice as soon as possible; even if you plan to use an attorney. Otherwise you’ll be at the mercy of the bureaucrats that run the divorce industry. This is no time to be clueless and helpless depending on others to guide you the system that will determine the rest of your life.
This is just some divorce advice that can help you have a faster, cheaper, easier divorce with less stress and a better result. Please feel free to leave a comment. For more advice, please visit the rest of this site.